Knight Lager

Now most of you reading this know that I’m currently in Hong Kong for work for a month. Now Hong Kong has lots of things but cheap beer isn’t one of them…or so I thought. Most beer here are imported from other countries and lots of them are “fancy man” beers. Also when you buy beer here, you’re either buying 4 packs or 640ml individual bottles. However, when I went up to Victoria Peak to do some sightseeing, I ran across a grocery store that had 12 packs. My curiosity was piqued so I browsed their beer aisle. There were the usual suspects but I ran across a 12 pack that I couldn’t pass up. Knight Lager. It was 28HKD which is roughly $3.50 or so in USD. I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to try Hong Kong’s version of cheap beer even if it meant that I had to lug the 12 pack onto the tram back down the mountain.

First off, I’m going to use Bushey’s extended Bundy Scale which includes Kelly Bundy and Steve Rhodes heads. Since I basically had to go to a grocery store on the top of a mountain in Hong Kong to find Knight Lager, I’m going to give it 5 Steve Rhodes heads. The can says it was brewed by the San Miguel Brewery in New Territories, Hong Kong but I prefer to think that instead of being the beer that the San Miguel company scrapes out of the bottom of the barrel after they finish brewing and bottling their main product, that it was brewed by enlightened monks who came up with the recipe for the beer after an intense round of meditation. Unfortunately, the former is far more likely.

Now for can attractiveness. I have to give Knight 5 Kelly Bundys. I like the logo and can design a lot. The dark blue can and regal design conjures up memories of my favorite beer of all-time, Strohs. I also like the vague claims that Knight Lager is “Export Quality” and “Special Lager”. What exactly constitutes a beer that is “Export Quality”? I have no clue but I like the fact that they’re bold enough to say that their beer is awesome enough that other countries should buy it. Also, on the side of the can, it says, “Knight Lager is brewed from the finest ingredients, delivering the full rich taste of a truly special beer.” Now, what those ingredients are is never stated. I learned from Leon Gillespie, a friend of mine here and the boyfriend of my co-worker Emily,that cheap beer here in Hong Kong is likely to be rife with chemicals so those special ingredients most likely include paint thinner or anti-freeze so it’s probably best you don’t know what’s in Knight Lager.

Well, now that we’ve covered scarcity and attractiveness, we need to cover the main thing, the taste. To say I’m disappointed is an understatement. For a beer that comes in such a cool can and that you can only find in a random grocery store on top of a mountain the taste just isn’t there. The first one I drank actually was kind of bad. Went down kind of harsh and had a skunky aftertaste. I guess maybe I got the one terrible one in the batch (probably went a little heavy on the anti-freeze in that one) b/c the subsequent ones I’ve had haven’t tasted like much. I’ve had 5 of them in the days since the initial one I drank and while they’ve gone down smooth, the taste just isn’t there. It’s a light lager but that doesn’t mean that the taste should be non-existent. However, it clocks in at 4.5% so you probably get a pretty good buzz without having to drink a whole lot of them. Which is a good thing b/c according to Leon, a Knight Lager hangover is not something you want to experience. He’s also used Knight Lager to play a game called “Hermit” with his friends. Hermit involves you and your friends each getting a 12 pack or a set amount of beer. You each go into a separate room with no lights, no tv, no cell phone, no outside stimuli of any kind and you can’t leave without finishing all of your beer. Whoever is the first one to finish wins. What you win I don’t know but I’m sure winning a game of Hermit is something you can put on your resume. In any case, I’m only going to give Knight Lager 2.5 Bundy Heads overall. The taste isn’t offensive or anything but it’s just not memorable. It gets an extra .5 Bundy Heads because of the extremely cheap price.